Hi. It's me, Vian.
It's been a while kan I'm not here. Last entry was on 2021 - year of I lost someone who I dearest the most. And guess what, I do missing him sometimes. It happened when something triggered of our memories together. But don't worry, I already drag my feet from the past and can accept that he is a married man now. He finally in his new life chapter.
And me?
Of course I'm in my new life phase now. Though my status are still not married yet, but this phase life are new for me.
A life phase when I do accepting whatever happen in my life, unquestionable.
Accepting the fate that I'm still here, sitting on the chair in the same room as picture in the entry 02022020, doing blogging while listening to some calmest song - accepting I'm still alive here - accepting someone who want to come to my life and accepting if they want to go. I don't have much energy to start over the feeling nor to stop someone from leaving. I'm in my "if you want to stay, then stay. If you want to leave, then leave" era.
But, is it acceptance is same a giving up? Accept all the things that happen to you and even mostly give less react on it. Or I'm just giving up? Or I'm just tired?
Maybe its true, I'm tired. Now I'm tired. Its 11:11 pm now and I'm not sure what I'm trying to writing now. Maybe I'm just tired and my nostalgic feeling hits me tonight, so that's why I'm here.
Erm, I think sampai sini saja dulu I'm writing. But I janji, I will come here again for sure. Until then, wait for me ya.
Adios.
